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  Part 4: Body language. 

  This a series of articles about body language for women so come back to the for women only page every week to see if there is something new.

  How to Know When a Man is Listening and Cares About What You Have to Say; by Understanding Body Language.  Part 4. 

Make sure you read part 1, 2, and 3 Body Language first. Click Here.

  Words of warning

  Because body language is such a powerful tool, you need to take care when using it - so, before you begin, a few words of caution!

  First, it's a myth that body language allows you to read a person like a book.  This theory, which was an attempt to 'alphabetize' non-verbal communication by defining a single gesture as having a single meaning, was originally fashionable in the sixties.  If people scratched their nose, that meant they were lying.  It didn't matter whether they were scratching because their nose itched, because they were nervous or because nose-scratching was an important ritual in their sub-culture - they were still seen as lying.  Nowadays, we know it's just not that simple.  Body language elements differ in meaning, and can be understood only in the context of a person's life situation.

  Second, using body language successfully isn't about ignoring the words; using words, to emphasize body language, to elaborate on them, to control them or even to contradict them.  To be a real body language expert, use your non-verbal skills in addition to, not instead of, your verbal ones.

  Finally don't think you can use body language to get others to do what you want.  People aren't fools.  If you try applying non-verbal techniques in order to manipulate someone into liking you, then of course they'll respond to what you do - but they'll also respond far more strongly to those of your actions that reveal your manipulation.  They'll register, often unconsciously, your false smile, your shifting eyes, your nervous stutter - and will act accordingly.  So if you're expecting to be able to rule the world through body language, you'll be disappointed! However, using them in a truthful way will get you everywhere.  I read and use body language all the time with great success.

Go to the FOR WOMEN ONLY page every week to see if there is something new.

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